I Never Thought....

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....that I would ever hear the following two phrases uttered out of my mouth:

"No, you cannot eat dogfood." and "Where else did you put poop?" and all within the time span of 20 minutes. I swear, people must think that I just let my children roam free and just throw them food when it's feeding time. Perhaps I'm just overly inattentive - I'm not, although from the things that happen around here...

Zachary thinks he can apparently change his own diaper now. Well, he is almost three. He wears underwear all day until naptime - and then he can't be trusted (as seen in previous posts). His own odor was too much for him the other day, so he decided to change himself. I came in to get him after nap and the smell in his room about knocked me over. So I asked the obvious: "Did you poop in your diaper?"

"I'm not wearing a diaper!"

Right. I forgot. He's wearing Pull-ups. My bad.

"Did you poop in your Pull-up?"

"I'm not wearing a Pull-up!"

Surely my brain hasn't retired so much as to forget to change him from his underwear into a pull-up for naptime (although it is a distinct possibility).

So - I did the obvious. I checked. He wasn't wearing either.

He smiled. "I changed my diaper all by myself!"

So, I turned around. There's (gagging) poop stains on the carpet...where is the rest of it? Shoved with all the wipes he tried to clean himself with into the over-flowing diaper genie. Lovely. And then to one of the questions I never thought I'd hear myself say: "Where else did you put poop?"

Out with the clorox wipes, carpet cleaner and misc other cleaning gear to take care of yet another lovely mess.

On the bright side, I am certain that my son will not be 14 and still in diapers. Right?